Dolphin-assisted Birth Comes Under Fire From Science Experts

As profiled in an article in the Daily Mail (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2331946/Dolphin-birth-Experts-blast-couple-flying-Hawaii-DOLPHIN-assisted-birth.html), a North Carolina couple is planning a birth "aided" by dolphins.  Yes, you read that correctly, dolphins.  Some of my observations:

• Since when are marine animals necessary for something humans have been doing successfully for thousands of years?  Did a regular midwife not cut it?  Why dolphins and not some other friendly creature like say, a porcupine?
• Expert Christine Wilcox, writing in Discover, claims that dolphins are known to "toss, beat, and kill small porpoises or baby sharks for no apparent reason other than they enjoy it."  So, dolphins regularly kill things that can breathe underwater, but this couple think their air-breathing newborn will be fine?
• Neither parent has a job, and they have no idea where they will live or how they will make money after the birth.  Yeah....on second thought, the baby may be safer with the dolphins.
• Neither parent has washed their hair in at least a year.  Maybe they should try a birth aided by shampoo.  I hear that they are all the rage in Portland.

If these people don't win a Darwin award, I am going to lose all faith in humanity.